I’ve put on less weight!

I've put on less weight!

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I don’t know if you noticed, but the title of my column (I have put on weight for less) is a great reference, as the toucans would say, or a big xupinhação, as I would say, from a blog that I love called “I’ve killed for less ”, which incidentally, if you don’t know you are wasting your time here with my nonsense about weight loss.
After I already wrapped you up with that paragraph above, I want to say that I continue to wrap myself up another day. I haven’t weighed myself yet, I haven’t entered the diet, I’m still eating a delicious dulce de leche that is hidden in my pantry and if you allow me, it looks like they put whipped cream inside the dulce de leche. Simply DI-VI-NO! If you are not on a diet, like me (I mean, so to speak), or if you love dulce de leche, this is a worthwhile one. The brand is called Jersey de Itu, Doce de Leite Premium, and it’s really good.
Ahhh .. and I keep reading the book too. And I think that’s what you’re reading all my bullshit for now, so come on.
I got to the calorie part. Every diet has to do with calories and this could not be otherwise. I also know that you will tell me that if I go to weight watchers it will not have to do with calories, but with a score and a rebels and blablabla method, in short, the same thing. If I can’t eat what I want indefinitely and whenever I want, it’s because I’m on a diet and counting something, be it calories, dots or apples.
So, let’s get to the calories. According to the book Cook yourself skinny, each 1 pound, approximately 500 grams, equals 3500 calories. As women in general should eat 2000 calories a day to stay on weight, the book proposes that I eat 1500, so I will save 500 a day and at the end of a week (7 × 500 = 3500) I will have saved 3500 calories and lost almost 500 grams. Is that even possible? I honestly have my doubts. I know I should do one of those tests that tell me how many calories my body consumes and stuff. I even did it once and it was around 2000. Not to mention that these tests are very expensive and I don’t want to do it again. So, I’ll try to make those 1500 calories (when the dulce de leche, of course).
Leaving the calories and going back to real life, I’m still in a dilemma, because I think I have to lose weight. I mean, I know I just want to lose weight to be closer to global media standards and that it shouldn’t be a problem, even because I consider myself a feminist and my body shape shouldn’t be a problem for me. Even because I’m wearing 40 and that’s not so much. I can make a thousand excuses here and tell you that in fact I want to lose weight because of my health and because I shouldn’t be eating so much sweets and because I want to be a healthier person and grow older and all this nonsense that everyone talks about, but this is a big lie and i will not stay here lying to me or even to you. I want to lose weight to look exactly like all the actresses and models and presenters who are bombarded me every day through blogs, websites, TV shows, magazines, newspapers and whatever else is out there. This is the standard of beauty, just as in the 18th century it was the waistline marked by corsets. Today the pattern is this, very thin or any woman-fruit. As I don’t fit in any woman-any-fruit and I’m terrified of having plastic surgery and I can’t imagine putting silicone on my butt or chest, I found that I need to be unhappy trying to achieve aesthetic standard 1 (thin, without chest and without ass). I’m sure that right now there will be 83789 comments cursing me. I mean, it won’t have all that, because my blog doesn’t have all this access, but anyway, it will have a lot.
As I have just arrived at a nonsense myself, I will reflect on this a little and continue reading the book tomorrow.
PS: I’m happy because the dulce de leche isn’t over yet.
Text posted on 19.10.2013 in I Could Kill For Dessert. The column I already put on weight for less joi transferred to this blog.
PHOTO: Paulo Cuenca | @paulocuenca
FOOD STYLE: Danielle Noce | @nocedanielle
If you are not worried about the diet, this is my favorite dulce de leche and you can find the recipe here!

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